Surprise Surprise

I'm about to do something I very rarely do.
I'm going to write, at length, about the NBA.
I know it sounds so unlike me to concern myself with the Association, a league I've pretty much given up on since the retirement of Michael Jordan, Round 3.
Lately, though, the newest class of NBA superstars like Dwight Howard, Dewayne Wade, King Lebron James, Chris Paul, and the new Kobe Bryant have made me love the game again.
Shaq's resurgence as a dominant figure has also played a big part in my growing interest in the league.
Thus, I'm going to layout the stretch run in the form of my playoff predictions.

EAST
First Round
1 Boston v. 8 Chicago
The Celtics currently trail the Cavaliers for the number 1 spot, but with more than 20 games left, I think "The Big Ticket" can lead the green machine back to the top. I also think that Jordan himself has one more return coming that will lead the Bulls to overtake the mighty Bucks. Just joking, I think a Michael Redd-less Bucks team is sure to collapse. BOS 4-2

2 Cleveland v. 7 Philadelphia
This, in my opinion would be an incredibly lopsided series. Basically, I have zero faith in the Sixers. CLE 4-0

3 Orlando v. 6 Detroit
I think moving Iverson to the bench will serve to spark enough of a spurt for the Pistons to jump Philly, but that's about it. If Iverson and Rip can play nice enough to work some magic of their own (sorry for the pun), this seems to be the most likely upset chance of the East side. ORL 4-3

4 Miami v. 5 Atlanta
Atlanta has seemed shaky this year, but who knows what could happen. I expect this to be the most closely contested series, as a 4-5 should be. MIA 4-3

Second Round
Boston v. Miami
I'm not actually going to predict any upsets in the Eastern first round, but I recognize the potential. This series will be a classic, as I expect big things from D-Wade. BOS 4-3

Cleveland v. Orlando
Don't expect as much of a close series as one might expect. King James and friends really make their system work, and I really don't like the way Orlando is coached. Mr. Howard will help keep the series from being a sweep. CLE 4-2

Championship
Boston v. Cleveland
I really like both of these teams. That's all i can say, other than that I can't wait for this series. CLE 4-3

WEST
First Round
1 LA Lakers v. 8 Phoenix
This one was just too easy, and will be a nightmare for those of us who hate cliche broadcasting. "Shaq vs. Kobe...too bad it's not Christmas day... blah blah blah." Expect brilliant quotes from the big fella and prolific non-answers from Kobe to follow such original inquiries as "are there any hard feelings from that trade that happened five years ago?" LAL 4-2

2 San Antonio v. 7 Utah
This is the only upset I'll actually predict. Partially because I think Utah is better than their record might indicate and partially because I flat don't like the flopaholic, complaining Spurs, I'll take Boozer and the Jazz. UTA 4-2

3 Denver v. 6 Houston
I'll just take the Nuggets and be done. Houston is the most gloriously mediocre team in sports history. You can never pick against their being in the playoff hunt, nor their ability to make absolutely no headway once they get there. DEN 4-1

4 Portland v. 5 New Orleans
The Hornets are another one of my favorite franchises, and this, like the East 4-5, will be a battle. I expect the Hornets will win, but the Blazers are slowly developing into what could be a scary good franchise in the near future. NO 4-3

Second Round
LA Lakers v. New Orleans
I wish I could say that the Hornets could pull off the upset against Kobe and friends, but I just don't think David West's 65-year-old back and Tyson Chandler can handle Pau and Drew. Also, I don't see anyone in N'Awlins stopping the Dobermamba. LAL 4-2

Denver v. Utah
Big game Chauncey and 'Melo are going to be a dream together in the postseason, and this will probably be their masterpiece series. Expect lots of highlights. DEN 4-2

Championship
LA Lakers v. Denver
I would love to be different and pick a team other than the Lakers out of the West, but that just doesn't seem realistic. LAL 4-2

NBA FINALS
LA Lakers v. Cleveland
If you bought stock in the company that produces all the "Next Michael Jordan" statements, this series will set you up for an early retirement. Also looking to profit are the "King's first crown" people and the folks who brought you "Can Kobe finally win a ring without Shaq?" CLE 4-3

Honestly I don't know who would win that last series.
I just wanted to pick a team that wasn't Lakers or the Celtics, and the Bulls and Heat seemed too unlikely.
Basic synopsis is that there are 4-5 teams with a legitimate shot at winning the East, but the Lakers are the cream of a surprisingly weak crop of Western playoff teams.
The records out West are better overall, but, for once, the Eastern teams are better, in my opinion.
By the way, I'm glad those pre-season Clipper picks went so well for everyone.